Dec 29, 2009


Lately I have been hanging out with the boys for far too much...

well, it's not like it's something new, it's just that for the past few weeks, I've hanged out with guys more than girls...

For example, just two weeks ago, I went out to the beach with two guys... for what? Just to go and see the beach... SEE THE FREAKING BEACH! we didn't even swim in it! @_@

Then, sometime last week, I head out for some late night coffee with 4 other boys. at 12 am. and I came back home around 2... We sat at the coffee shop, playing poker, while watching a Liverpool game on tv. How pathetic...

And then..just now, i went to have some dim sum with a girl and 4 boys... GAH!!



can't help it... growing up with two little brothers must've made me more comfortable around guys than girl... not to mention i was closer to my dad rather than to my mom :3

anyway...sleepy... zzzzz

...stupid net...


I wrote a damn long entry... and it disappear when i wanted to publish it...

Now i don't feel like writing anymore...

Oct 19, 2009

Bye Bye Anatomy~~

I never thought that there will be a day that I'll miss anatomy classes. But here am I, thinking that the classes would last much longer.


Thank God I decided to take third week subject, instead of settling for sixth week forensic. It has been fun, and gave me a whole lot new experiences. Not many can say they've dissected bodies, eh?

And the classmates, you guys are such a sport! I'm going to miss our class together...

Plus Dr Juned is as cute as always.. xD

Our small Dissection class...
(with Dr Juned at the middle)

wtf??? what kind of face am I making??? x_X

And that wraps up our Anatomy class... FOREVER!!! Well, at least until we graduated from here.. XD

Sep 23, 2009

My Lil Brother Amir

Amir on shy cousins:

"Dia ingat, duduk umah sebab nak putihkan kulit, hitam jek aku tengok!"
"You think that they'd stay at home to make their skin brighter, but they still as dark as ever!"

Amir on piggyback:

"Kak, encang aku kak... aku tau.. ko leh punya!"
"Sis, give me a piggyback, I know you're able to!"
He's 178cm and weighs 75 kg...

Amir on chores:

"Kak, mak suruh ko kira batu, pastu beras tu asingkan, 100 biji beras per mangkuk"
"Sis, mom asked to count the stones...and to separate the rice grains into bowls of 100s.."

Amir when asked where is he going:

"Aku nak pergi cucuk langit, lepas tu pergi mati, nak ikut?"
"I'm going to do the shuffle, then I'm going to die... do you want to follow me?"

"Aku nak gi berak...nak ikut?"
"I'm going to poop, want to join?"

Oh Amir....

These are only a few examples of his smart-assery... >.>

And he's only 14...

Sep 19, 2009

raaaaaage: real rage

Some Malay guys have unreasonable expectant on women.
They expect their women to be beautiful, gentle, smart, assertive, obedient, will speak their own mind and willing to stroke their egos.

Oh, and not to mention, to have superhuman strength and stamina.

Basically a first class girl, when they themselves mostly are first class jerk and third rate men. >.>

Who in the right mind, would ask a full-time working woman, to do all the house chores after coming back from her work, cook, take care of the children, "layan" the husband and whatever shitload of work? Must be some madmen under the delusion that girls are robots that do not tire.

Dammit guys! Just because you think (think because I bet you never tried doing it) that you can do it, don't expect the girls to do it!

Okay, okay, not all guys are like that, you said. Yes, I agree... that's why I said, SOME MALAY GUYS! Why Malay guys? Because I grew up around Malays.. and I am a Malay, my friends are mostly Malays, and my brothers' friends are Malays too.

What makes you think that I'm capable of replacing the shitload heavy carpet while having to move around a fuck heavy love seat, a OMG-I-can't-believe-I've-got-to-move this sofa and a coffee table?


His room is neater than mine.

This is not fair!!

Mitch and Cain: Part 4

You sure are feisty. I can’t forget how you calmly punched the face of the girl who cornered you. It was funny as hell. The girls were getting on my nerves, and you conveniently “finished” them for me. They never messed with any girls seen talking with me anymore. Maybe they were afraid to continue the “little chat” with you. No wonders no guys wanted to make you his girlfriend. You’re too scary.

Heh. They’re just too stupid to see past your silence and scariness. For that I’m glad. Else I’d be fighting nails and teeth over you. Not that I mind any way. Then again, there were guys who liked you. All were given personal warning from me to steer clear from you. Those who didn’t, well, they get a special treatment from yours truly. So, sorry to break your little bubble of self-confidence of guys leaving you alone because of your so called feistiness. I’m the one who ordered them to do that. It was nice to see you alone, and it would be fantastic to see you walking with someone. But I want that someone to be me, not one of those useless bastards.

When you introduced yourself at me, I was shocked. I can’t believe that you knew me. I was really flattered that you were interested in me; it’s like having my love returned. Of course you didn’t know that yet. I made sure of that. That, and the fact that I had been watching you since the day you arrived at the college. I’m good at keeping up a front aren’t I? You never know that all the while you thought you were walking alone; I was there right behind of you.

Stalker, he definitely is a stalker. A certified one it seems. This means, he knew she was watching him all this while! Oh noes! Groaning, she buried her face into her pillow. Four years and he still can make her feel embarrassed.

Yeps, I knew you were watching. Like Silverchair said, the greatest view is watching you watched over me. Do you want to know what it made me feel? When I caught you staring at me, it made me feels like I can do anything and get away from it. That’s why I’m acting like a real jerk when you were around. I just knew you will forgive me and wrote it off as one of my antiques. Stupid isn’t it?

Speaking of sneaking looks, do you still draw when you’re extremely bored? Can you sing properly now? Do you still wear purple eyeliner? Or have you change to hideous yellow just to spite me?

Do you know that I really like watching you during class? You have so many reactions that it’s amazing that the lecturers never noticed you were distracted. Most of the time you’ll keep your head bowed so near to the table. That’s your “serious drawing position”. Somehow I managed to take a look into your note books. Then the head-on-hand style, with your right hand frantically writing something. To others, maybe you look like you’re listening tentatively. But I know better, you were writing whatever song lyrics that suited your moods, or captions of your current emotions.

Sep 11, 2009

Douchebag in Ramadhan

I went to the immigration office yesterday after exam to settle my ERP (exit-reentry permit). Don't ask me why I have to do that.. each and every time before I fly back home. That, and Free-Fiscal application... >.>;;

Anyway, went there, fetch my passport, and I had to photocopy the latest ERP stamp in it. So I went to the photocopy shop at the office where they overcharge the service 5 times than what you can get outside (damn!), and there's this middle-aged lady photocopying in front of me. Being the good girl that I am.. I queued up behind her. Patiently, and quietly... she had so much trouble photocopying a lot of documents.

Then suddenly a guy came, and FUCKING CUT MY QUE!! It was a hot afternoon, and I've just finish my exam. My heels are hurting me, and I want no more than just photocopy a page, and go home. And this fucking douchebag had to cut my que, and photocopied 4 copies of 4 documents. Plus he didnt even have enough change to pay for it. Damn it!

I was so furious, that I went straight back to the parking lot after submitting my copied ERP. Then I realized that Jern was at the office too.... ARGH! ;_____;

Sep 5, 2009

Sunday Morning

Sunday morning at 8
Blankets all over me as I sprawled in my bed
Sun rays hit me right in the face
Irritated, I pull my blanket over my head
Unproductive, lazy day I intended to sleep
All day long

The beep of my phone
Pulled me out of slumber land as I crawled towards it
Just another message from the service provider
Frustrated, I cursed them for wasting my time
Hazy, sleepy day I do not want to do anything
All day long

So I went back into my dreams
Where I’m the king and villain at the same time
Real and imaginary characters overlapping
As I sit and lick my strawberry ice cream in front of
The TV

Before I knew it
My grumbling stomach woke me up
And I realize
“Shit! It’s 6 pm!”

Sep 1, 2009

Anti-Malaysia Sentiment

Yesterday I posted about there's no anti-Malaysia sentiment movement in Jogja.
Well friends, I stand corrected.

This morning, there was a demonstration by students from Politic Social Faculty. With the same haet message: Malingsia.

Wtf man!

Of course we share a lot of similar culture! We are urm.. what is serumpun in English? XD
But that was aaaaaaaaaaaages ago! A lot of Javanese migrated here, not to mention Bugis, Malays from Sumatera, lalalaa~

But the students from Politic Social, well guys, your demo is one day too late. You're supposed to do it yesterday, during our Independence Day... guess you're never really that alert to things that don't revolve around you, huh? And you call yourself Politic students? tsk tsk tsk...



My stomach lurched when you said you were going away....
And you're already so far away to begin with....



Sentimen anti-Malaysia?
Entah. Kat Jogja takde plak.... XD.

We were never been denied(?) to celebrate Independence Day. In fact, every 31st August, we will hold a celebration in campus. Maybe not as huge ass as it is in back home, but yeah we hung Malaysian flag, sang Negaraku and all other patriotic songs....

And had the juniors to perform for us. Which for me, is the best part. Hehe, all those silly acts from the juniors XD

this year we had a short sketch, a musical, a fashion show, and another one is undefinable >.>;;

and i had this cute junior sitting next to me during the performances, going thru his audio/video arrangement with me...
(his name is Jack btw, Captain Jack Sparrow >.>;;)

Anti-Malaysia? only present during futsal/basketball match against us... and used by retarded students only. the cool ones don't even bother~

Aug 27, 2009


I went to see you today
Just to confirmed what I felt yesterday
And the days before

I sensed changes in you
But I refused to believe my eyes
Deluding myself with petty illusions

I’m afraid to look at you directly
Because I don’t want to know
What exactly you’re thinking

What signs you gave
I would not understand
Or is it just because I do not want to?

Please don’t leave me
I would not beg directly
I’m too proud for it

Love me unconditionally
I will not ask for it
I don’t think I deserve it

I tried my antiques today
But they didn’t have the same effects
As they did yesterday

Have you really gone far?
Have you really left me?
Have I no meaning for you anymore?

Yet in my heart I know
The answers to my questions
Even if I denied them

The truth I do not want to see
The past I wanted to stay
The future I cannot escape

It’s eating me inside out
Even so, I can't let you go.

Aug 25, 2009

utterly hopeless

A heart flutter
My stomach flip
I got this funny feeling
Every time I say your name
Tell me
What is it?

Aug 22, 2009


Yep, Ramadhan is here~

Marhaban ya Ramadhan..

Selamat Berpuasa to all muslims..

don't ever skip your fast without any legal reason.. XD

Aug 20, 2009

Shattered Windows

Shattered windows
Stared back at me
Pieces of me reflected
On the broken glass
Broken light, color spins
Reaching out I could almost feel
The warmth
Of the sun, laughing
I gather my courage
And walked out the gloomy room
Through the shattered windows

Aug 16, 2009

Book Review: The Kite-Runner

It has been ages since I've done a book review.....
So, here it is, a review on Khaled Hosseini's The Kite-Runner
I was so touched by the book, I made short notes/poems/things based on how I feel about it

All hail the new style (and probably I won't do it again) of orange review~

you know you like it~ XD
and actually, I've read and done the review since last year...--''

The Kite-Runner
Author: Khaled Hosseini
Publisher: Riverhead; Later Printing edition (January 1, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN: 1-57322-245-3 (first edition, hardcover)

You and I, we were inseparable
You were the better half of me, the source of my envy
You love me unconditionally and for me,
A thousand times over

You died for me. Like you said you would
But I don’t think I deserved such loyalty.

I know I wronged you
It haunts my dreams
For 20 years I tried to forget you
But you, you still love me

“You were too hard on yourself, you were just a kid”
No, I wasn’t. I could’ve done something.
He has done so much for me

Regrets, how I wish I stood up for you

“I love you, but you steal him from me!”

All those darken nights
All those frightful dreams
All those regretful feeling
All those painful thoughts
Are now gone
Thank you, for forgiving me

As the sky filled with bright colored kites
Shadows lifted from my heart, from my soul
Suddenly nothing else mattered
Cause finally, I’m with you

For you, a thousand times over………….

(All are written based on Amir's feelings on Hassan, his bestfriend)

picture from

the words he said

I trust you and you trust me, I know that you are smart and I know you are going to make good decisions, so you do whatever you want to do.

you've made me happy, thank you :)

Aug 15, 2009

Word Jumbo Sales

Today, I’m going to post random things I found in my sketch book. Most of them will not make any sense and I suspect, 90% of them were left hanging by yours truly…


We are fated to be enemies
Both are on the other side of destiny
Our meeting will bring destruction
To us and the world around

And yet, I can’t stop my heart from loving you
- inspired by Sugar Sugar Rune

I am lost without you
How am I supposed to live without you
Would I betray you if I love somebody else?
- Inspired by life events

You are the epitome of perfection
I wish you’re dead
- My wishful thinking…

This is a set of three

1. And I carved your face
In stone
Just to smash it to smithereens

2. Will it satisfy me to carve out my heart and burn it to ashes?

3. How many times do I have to cut myself just to see it bleed?

All of these are separates, unless otherwise stated

I poured all my dreams in you
When it’s over, I felt blissfully empty

There’s no life worth dying for
If I found it, I’ll gladly gave my soul for it

I hide myself for fame
But it consumed me

I can’t see myself without the other


I think boredom

Will one day

Finally kill me

You haunt my being

Everything I do, reminds me of you

I can’t even start anew

Somehow, loving you

Destroys me too

Until now, I still chase after you
- Inspired by d.n.j.h

Never you, always me

And I’ll gladly give my love to something

That will not break my heart

- L’Arc~en~Ciel-centric…

darkness consumed me, hence inspired all these words...

From My Window

I looked outside, through my window

Through the curtain


And glass

Straight ahead there’s a wall

A small tended garden

And my neighbor’s roof.

The sun is shining


From my window

But in my room

It’s as dark as night

Aug 14, 2009

Mitch and Cain: Part 3

Cain had always piqued her interest. He was friendly with boys and girls alike, joking with them all the time. There’s always smile on his face. However, there’s something about him that made her think there’s more to Cain than just a class clown. Okay, a class-clown with very cute face. With his charming grin and boyish face, plus his dare-devil bad boy way, it’s little wonder that Cain had unintentionally gained an array of fans. Since he treated them all nicely, his unofficial fan club only grew bigger day by day. Sadly, that made Cain off-limits to the girls.

Never one with the crowd, somehow the social rules weren’t implied on Mitch. No matter how outrageous her doings, she always got away without a scrape. Unintentionally, she kept under the radar, and when caught, she always looked so guilty, people just let her go. So when she approached Cain, none of the girls from the fan club gave her their famous “warning”.

She wished. Cain’s fan club members weren’t as forgiving as others. She was cornered after class the day she introduced herself to him. Surrounded by ten menacing looking girls, it did not scare her one bit. Disinterestedly, she stared off towards the scenery behind the girls while thinking of dinner. One girl broke the silence.

“Why did you approach Cain? Don’t you know he belongs to us?”

Inspecting her nails now, she purposefully ignored the question. Talking to herself, she walked out of the ring of girls, oblivious to the angry expressions. Two steps, and her bag was yanked by one of the girls. Taking off the earphone at her left ear, she turned deliberately toward the bag-puller.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you. Let go of my bag”

Naturally the puller refused, and yanked her bag harder.

“You know, they left me alone for a reason. And this bag is one of a kind. You can’t find it in stores anymore”

She wouldn’t budge. Her friends moved to close on Mitch once again. Sighing, she shrugged off her bag and sat cross-legged on the floor. Ten girls cowered over her, all with murder in her eyes. Mitch shook her head; these girls definitely do not know who they are messing with. She stood up again, dusted the sand off her back and spoke.

“Dudes, give me some space will you? I’m claustrophobic okay?”

That line made the girls closing tighter around Mitch. Smirking, they were making life as difficult as possible for Mitch. They thought they were doing rather great, since making life difficult was their specialty. But not today, today their world is going to be a bit different.

One of the girls started jabbing her fingers at Mitch. Instantaneously, ten fingers were poking her with varying speed and intensity. At the same time, they were yelling simultaneously at her. The jabbing soon turned to pushing, and Mitch was pushed around like an unwanted kitty. The yelling got worse, sentences spoken without stopping. Still Mitch let them, keeping her silence. Fervently she wished for a witness. When she was pushed against the wall, her prayers were answered. She got her witness.

A guy accidentally saw the little scene during his aimless stray. Letting the girls messed around with her a little bit more, Mitch managed to look like a victim in the little affair. After the guy left to call a teacher (the guys knew better than meddling with girls’ affairs), she punched the face of one of her tormentors.

The punched-out girl staggered back. Other girls gasped. Gingerly picking her bag that was left lying, Mitch spoke to the group:

“That is the main reason why the girls left me alone, and boys don’t affect me at all. Sorry dudes, you guys were no match for me. And as for Cain, I pity him for having you guys as his fans. He’s a good guy, and you manage to make him look bad. Too bad that doesn’t make me want to leave him alone. So if you want to continue our little chat, feel free to corner me again tomorrow, okay?”

With that, she walked out of the scene, just in time as the guy arrived with a teacher. Popping on her earphone back, she turned up the volume and sang along with the song from her mp3 player. She never noticed another person watching her from behind the wall. Nor did she notice the evil way he was grinning.

Aug 10, 2009

holidays and new semester


One week had passed since I officially became a fourth year. FOURTH FREAKING YEAR??

It seems like yesterday, when i first arrived to Jogja. and i can still vividly remember the "horrors" of orientation week.

The Bali trip, my dad's sickness and his death, the terrible break-up, my crushes on two guys at the same time, PKPMI-CY projects, sienkrutz formation.....

All the time just flies... and before I know it, I'm gonna be 23 this year, and I'm a super senior...

and that, sounds OLD. -_-;;

Few things happened during the holiday season:
  1. i went to Kota Kinabalu with Aisyah
  2. shopping
  3. Went to JB to see Aisyah
  4. Went to Singapore with Aisyah
  5. Hangout with Anet, Raje, Achot, Kuzi, Jet, Alia and Ros
  6. I met Zul's girlfriend, Ida
  7. and spent hours on irc...
  8. i even volunteered to be a cleaner of a scanlation group, shi-ki~
and now, i'm so over Jern. hahaha! XD
one week has passed, and i've just started working on my proposal. haish~ XD
but i think, i'm gonna be stronger this semester, no more depressed episodes, no more thoughts of quitting, no more self-belittling. because they say, that love, is a very powerful thing, and i'm lucky i have it at my side.

I know now, that I'm not alone~

Jul 10, 2009


I baked a cake today.
it's called, Chocolate Orange Cake without Eggs.
or something like that.
basically, chocolate cake, with orange juice and without eggs inside.

here's the pic..

well... it doesn't look too yummy, does it?
i don't really cook, and this is my third attempt on baking.

i'll try something else, later~

Jul 8, 2009

Home sweet home~

I'm already back in Malaysia for 8 days.
And still haven't gone anywhere, except to the malls in Banda Hilir.
Since I'm out most of the time in Jogja, staying cooped up in my house really strained my patience.
I have no transport, my mom gives me curfews, and I had to wait up for my little brother to come back before I can go anywhere. By the time he reached home, half of the day is already gone...

But its all still good. For one thing, I can cut down my spending. Meaning, I only buy things that I need, without having to pay for food and transport. Oh yeah, my younger brother is my chauffeur~

My mom had this penchant of keeping me at home. I mean, she reluctantly allows me to go out, even when she's not around. What a girl supposed to do home alone? Doing house works? Dream on! Not me! So I spent time in front of the pc (thank god for the internet!), playing games, watching teevo and sleeping.... hemm... the routine looks similar when I'm in Jogja, isn't it? XD

Anyway, can't wait for Friday to come~
Aisyah will be here, and on Saturday, we'll both go to KLIA together to catch a plane to Kota Kinabalu!!

OMG!! I'm so excited!!!!

Jul 5, 2009


I really need to stop hanging out with my hang out buddy...
He’s a bad influence.

Last Friday (26 June 2009), a day after our block 18 exam, he asked me to go to Solo with him. I said ok. I’m bored, and the ride only took 1 hour from Jogja. But since I’m kinda broke, I told him that he’ll have to pay for the fuel, and I’ll pay for the food. So, okayla… Not much spending on my part.

The last time we went to Solo, he told me that he wants to visit a place called Tawangmangu, only at that time I heard it as Taman Mangu (okay… they sound similar). What’s in Taman Mangu, I asked. He said that it’s similar to Kaliurang (it’s kinda like Cameron Highland, minus the veggies and flowers). Oh, then there’s ride to the top without any walking needed. I don’t mind much, if there’s no walking involve. My calves ached from 2-hour straight swimming. Besides, I’m not the one who’s driving my trusted blue Suzuki Spin 125 cc whim I called Ken. He’s the one. I just had to sit at the back and enjoy the scenery, and singing along to my mp3 player.

Or so I thought.

Not only the ride took around 2 hours, which was when we arrived to TaWANGmangu (I figured out what it called after reading the signboards), plus he didn’t know where the hell is that place. We had to rely on signboards (that’s like chipsmore cookies, now it’s there, now it’s gone…) and instinct. Then suddenly he said he wanted to go to a waterfall that’s there. I was like, okaayyy…

Waterfall = walking

NOOOO!! I didn’t agree to this!

After Friday prayer (my first Friday prayer ever), we went to that waterfall, Grojongan Sewu (that name is so Javanese, there’s no mistaking where the hell are we).

First thought, HELL! It's gonna be a long walk down...

and I'm correct.

It was a long, winding road, infested with MONKEYS!!! Do becareful, don't ever, ever do anything stupid like feeding the monkeys....

Then we saw the waterfall... suddenly I think, it was worth the walk... (it's not that far, really, around 5 minutes walk.. XD)

We spend some time exploring the area...

yeah, yeah.. pose bajet cute...

monkey-infested bridge...

I took this picture behind a professional photographer.. kira aku curik angle dia la neh.. XD

kalau tengok betul-betul, ada orang dating kat situ.. hahaha~

let's go home...

After the waterfall, we went to Solo Square.. then dinner at Sego Penyetan near Depok Sports Center with JERN!!! (three of us... there's no way Jern's going to have dinner with only me... haihh..)

Arrived home around 9pm... so much for being able to be back before maghrib la kann~

Jun 6, 2009

It needs to stop

I cant take it anymore, this thing.

It will break me, sooner or later, I know.

This feeling, will be canned, and burned.

Bye bye.

Three years is long enough.

hup. Emo time is over. I'm back in business. All those nonsense of quitting, is now over...

I will follow this thing until it's through. Until it's over.

There will only be one answer, Success, or Squashed.

and I WILL prevail.

Jun 1, 2009

It was like a waltz, mysterious....

Confession: I am a hopeless romantic. I watched too many romance anime, and I read too many romance novel (though I only own a few, I sponged the rest off Erica and Farina.. LOL!).

Now I'm watching Honey and Clover. I know, I know, I'm like 4-5 years late off the anime, but what the hell!!

sweet giler!!!

Reread Tenshi Nanka Janai (I'm Not an Angel) a few days ago. No matter how many times I read it, Akira/Midori never fails to touch my heart... huaaa~~ I so want a boyfriend like Akira!! Ren pun okay gak, cause he's funneh... XD. But I don't want Koizumi George cause he's a manwhore. XD

oh yeahh!! balik rumah, nak cari lagi anime jiwang yang best.. and maybe truly follow NANA. And I want to listen to Laruku (the father band of all jiwangness) and X-JAPAN (the founder of japanese jiwangness) all day long~

cepatla cuti....

//Nee, nandakke sagashiteita mono?//
Hey, what was it that we were looking for again?//
-Waltz, Suneohair
Hachimitsu to Kurova
Honey and Clover

May 19, 2009


I am soooo tired.
Current block: Neurology and Psychiatry..

We have classes from 7am - 4pm nonstop almost daily.... with labs in between...

Like today, I had tutorial at 8-10, then 2 hours of lectures, skills lab for another two hours, and then lectures until 4.

Similar schedule yesterday, with Pharmaco lab at 8. Tomorrow will be the same. but i decided to be the bad girl and skipped the 7am lecture... I'll only come at 10 am... huhu..

Right now, I feel like a jell-o. halp!

May 10, 2009

Jumpa So7 lagi!!

Aku gi konsert Sheila On 7 malam tadi.

Birthday bash diorang yang ke 13. Honestly, I’m not really into SO7. I listen to them only because Aisyah does… Album diorang yang aku gila-gila tahu pun album kedua, Kisah Klasik tu.. 07 Des, bolehla sket2.. tapi latest two albums ni… tatau langsung! Nama je duk kat Jogja, kota So7.. tapi tak dengar. Wahahahhaha!!!

Anyways, aku tau pasal konsert ni sebab status NK…

NK ngan aku.. jari aku cover flash.. bodow! XD
biasala.. dia kan BIG FAN So7.. sampaikan Duta personally wish dia birthday… wakakaka! So, dah tau.. mestila aku gedik nak gi… lagipun arini kan cuti, esok pun cuti, exam baru habis, scholar baru masuk… makcik kayoo!!!! Huhu~ Maka, aku pun mengajaklaaa hangout buddies aku, Encik Jernih *clap clap clap* dan Encik Zul *silence….* untuk temankan aku gi…

hoho... orang-orang yang gi gig ngan aku... zul, balvin ngan jern...

Nak gi concert semangat giler! Aku sampai beli t-shirt untuk derang sain! Hohoho!! Aku ngan Zul kuar dinner dlu.. memula nak gi makan kat Nanamia, tapi penuh plak (plus pizza derang abis)... pindah ke PizzaHut.. penuh gak.. alih-alih makan kat 3 Nyonya plak... terbang duit aku... isk.... T_T

Pkul 9 malam dah ada dah kat Inna Garuda. Konsert start pkul 10 malam. Kan bagus aku datang lecture macam tu? Wahhahaha! Tapi tiket counter bukak awal.. aku rasa dalam pkul 9:30 tu, kitorang dah kat dalam Republic dah (Republic tu kat Hotel Inna Garuda). Jern belikan tiket, mestila dia tak belanja... tiket dalam Rp25 000... murah weii!! Cuba bahagi 3... dalam RM8 lebih jekk!! Hua hua hua!!!! Yang lawaknye, takde tiket.. derang tulis tiket untuk brapa orang tu kat kertas order.. lawak giler! Aku rasa Jern simpan kot kertas tu... nanti aku tanya dia...

derang cap tangan... tanda dah beli tiket.. rasa macam gi theme park plak! btw, kat Malaysia still buat cam ni ke? tak kan?

Pkul 10, ada opening band, band Kanda.. aku tak pernah dengar.. but then again, aku mana dengar band2 dari Indonesia neh! Hahaha , so memang aku takleh pakai… tapi derang baru release satu album.. dan dua single… boleh tahan gak arr band neh.. semua ahli bandnye comel-comel belaka.. almaklumlah.. adik-beradik! Hahahaha! Aku saspek gitaris ngan basis dia kembar… sebab muka serupa… XD

Kanda Band.. comel weyh vocalist dia!

Aku kat dalam tu.. dah panas dah… mana taknye, ramai orang, tolak-tolak lagi.. wohooo! Macam mana aku leh tahan pun aku tatau.. hoooo... anyway, pas Kanda Band tu, ada DJ perform.. DJ pe ntah.. aku tak dengar. Waha! But before that ada bagi free cd.. biasala aku.. malas nak berebut.. so tak dapat… free cds after DJ tu pun aku malas nak amik.. hahaha!

And then… Sheila On 7 keluar… all hell breaks lose!! Pushing, screaming… hoho! Aku dari 4th row, ntah macam mana, aku ikut Aida, boleh sampai front freaking stage! Aku kat DEPAN STAGE AND DUTA DEPAN MATA AKU SAMPAI BOLEH PEGANG!!! o_O.

muka Duta yang poyo.. LOL!
Tapi memang kena tolak, siku, rambut dan segala macamla... urgh. Dan majority budak yang gi concert malam tadi, bebudak sekolah. Aku tataula derang ni tau adat concert ke tak, tapi boleh plak mintak nak balik tempat derang berdiri tadi pas derang kuar.

Duta ngan Eross... Ngaha!!
Hello, ni dahlah takde seat, berasak-asak, ko bleh plak nak mintak orang bagi tempat ko diri balik? Nak gerak macam mana bai? Lepas tu plak, boleh plak marah-marah aku menyelit. Haha, kalau tak reti maintain tempat sendiri, pegila duk belakang! Banyak space and takde orang tolak... cakap pasal budak-budak pempuan yang menolak untuk duk depan neh.... dahlah tak reti maintain tempat sendiri (aku dah bebel pasal tu), pastu tak reti-reti plak nak jaga diri... Boleh pulak pas dah sampai depan, tak tahan panas and kena tolak, bukannye nak ke belakang (yang lebih lapang) boleh plak stay situ... THEN PENGSAN. Fuck.

Sebab ada orang pengsan, concert So7 kena cut short. Derang sempat main lagu dari first, second and third album jek…. The last two tak dapat.. bodoh bangang punya budak-budak! Total pengsan: 5 orang. Siap ada yang shock lagi. Haihhh….

Tapi, Duta memang cool. Bila derang diberitahu kena hentikan performance, dia nego dlu, siap nak buat akustik lagi kat luar! Too bad management tak bagi…uuuu…. Tapi kan… Duta tu… lawak giler!! Aksi dia on stage.. memang priceless! Dia melompat, buat muka bongok, gaya-gaya lawak… oh! Best!! Hahaha! Siap salin baju on stage lagi! W00t!!!

duta yang salin baju atas stage sambil korek hidung...-_-;;

Lepas gig tu, kitorang gi carik Duta kat luar.. nak mintak AUTOGRAPH!! Hahaha! Aku dapat dari Duta, Adam ngan Brian.. Eross… Eross takde! NK cakap, dia memang tak kuar jumpa fans pas gig/concert… sebab fans banyak molest dia.. hohoho! Kesian Eross… Kitorang bergambar arr ngan Duta! W00t! Dan, oleh sebab aku ni orang yang gedik… aku gi mintak tandatangan ISTERI DUTA!!!!! Hahahahahhaha!!!

Aida sebab kasut dia patah, dia mintak Duta sain kasut dia.. sungguh tidak boleh belah! Setelah tamat sesi sain-menyain, gambar...

ye, ye... zul ngan jern.. aku tak amik gambar ngan duta malam tadi..

dan pas dengar citer Dikky pasal budak shock, aku ajak Jern n Zul gi lepak jap.. so kitorang pun gi arr McD.. sebelum balik umah...

By the way... AKU BUSUK GILER PAS GIG TU! Argh!!!!

May 2, 2009

How to not feel guilty for not studying during exam time

This always happens to me. It is during week 6 that I usually have tons of (unimportant) things to do, and frequent long dinners. Just to escape the fact that I still haven’t finished reading my (tons of) notes or do any of the (stacks of) past years. Tonight, I’m planning to watch X-Men Origin while knowing fully that my paper will be on fakken Tuesday at 10 am.


Okay. So here are a few tips I made to not feel guilty for watching movie tonight.

  1. Study at least one lecture before going out.
  2. Convince yourself that you deserve this movie (plus long dinner) because you had just finished the stupid Pathology Anatomy exam.
  3. Try and do at least 10 questions from the past year.
  4. Do not discuss about exam with friends while out.
  5. Promise self to study non-stop for the next three days. No long lunch, and a long dinner is a definite no-no.
  6. Last but not least, never ever forget you still have exam on Tuesday. Just in case tonight fun drags to tomorrow and the day after….

Actually, I rarely feel guilty for not studying... hahaha! But since I promised myself to take third year very seriously, I’m trying to feel guilty for not studying…not guiltyla.. more like PANICKING!

So, any other additions for my list?

Apr 30, 2009

Exam wave~

Exam in less than a week away..
I still haven't finish my notes...
Nor have I started doing any of the past years....

Somehow, I don't feel motivated to even study for this block..
Why oh why obstetric-gynecology can be this boring....

I need to pull myself up and do it. Whether I like it or not.

Apr 26, 2009

Nak Tulis Sesuatu, Tapi Tiada Idea...

I really want to blog about something, anything, but currently I have absolutely nothing to rant. Too happy maybe?

Nah, not possible. My anatomy exam sucked (I’m hoping to pass…), my block exam is only two weeks from now, I still haven’t done my thesis proposal, I’m going to do thesis experiment tomorrow, I always have shortage of money, my best friend is far away from me (and most probably I couldn’t even see her this year), I have to look for a new hang out buddy (because the current one already had a girlfriend, so.. yeah…), and I don’t even have a boyfriend (okay, that’s not related).

But, still, I have nothing to write. For all the “misery” I’m experiencing, the "emotional roller coaster", the "heartache", the "heartbreak", the "loneliness", the "misunderstanding"… (I’m exaggerating) it’s still not enough. Not enough to evoke any creative juices to flow from the crypts and creases of my brain.

Then again, for two days in a row, I’ve been having dinner with Jern. From stalking paparazzi-like, to sengih-sengih during class, to raking my brain of what to say to him, now I’m upgrading to HANGING OUT with him. Yeahhh!!! Is that a progress or what!! HAHAHAHAHHA! (Sorry Payal, am I breaching the contract or something?) Haih… still nothing to write… except (prepare to puke guys! Mushy contents ahead!) “Waaa! Jern cute giler!” “He’s absolutely gorgeous!” “Woot! Sangat macho time main futsal!” “Aaaaa! Comellll!!!!”

Jern, trying out his new cardigan(?)

Ok. Enough.

Now I’m totally having writer’s block. Argh!

Apr 24, 2009

Hitoiro - One Color

Another single flower petal is torn off
And I don't have the power to stop the wind
As you break down crying on the far shore
This is the least I can give you in parting
You can forget the promise we made that day

How can a love that was just a step too late
Tear everything apart like this?
Once again the stardust flows
And I don't have the power to stop time
Say a prayer, you only need one
It's okay to wish for your own happiness

We allowed pain of the same color
While condemning mistakes of a different color
We lit fires of the same color
While hiding doors of a different color

Now a faded flower scatters for you
Now a faded star scatters for you
In your dreams, good night

How can a spoonful of love that got left out
Ruin everything like this?
On the street corner, it looks like another squall will hit
And I don't have an umbrella to guard my wounds
Find the exit, you only need one
It's okay to search for your own happiness

We beat rhythms of the same color
While silencing footsteps of a different color
We painted scenery of the same color
While shutting away seasons of a different color

Now a faded night scatters for you
Now a colored morning comes for you
In your dreams, good night

Sweet dreams, baby
Sweet dreams, baby

If someday we meet somewhere again
Will we be able to try again? Is there anything left?
Time's about to overtake us, but we can't reset it
Don't cry, kindness isn't weakness

We allowed pain of the same color
While condemning mistakes of a different color
We lit fires of the same color
While hiding doors of a different color

Now a colored flower blooms for you
Now a colored star falls for you
In your dreams, good night
Sweet dreams, baby
Sweet dreams, baby

Song: Hitoiro by Nakashima Mika
Translation by Megchan []

Saje layan jiwang memalam ni… hehe… Lagipun lagu ni pasal persahabatan, bukan pasal boyfriend pun~

Apr 20, 2009

The Pogung Ballad: Part 3

Remember this guy?

this picture is already 3 years old.... this was during our first year...

I once likened him to Takuya of UVERworld. ( please refer to this post)

and yeah, he's the guy who is happily married now.

the happily married couple

This is his wife, Sari. I have to edit the picture because Luqman said not to post any pictures that show his wife's face. The bad editing is due to me, being me (update blog sambil buat PA... sungguh tidak sedar diri saya ini!).
Sari is still in high school. Oh yeahh... this is my favorite gossip of the month!!! Luqman marrying a high school girl!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! yeah, I'm Evilina.... |||(-_-)

I first met Sari during batch project pool session. The first think that came to my mind was, "OMG, this girl is damn hot!!!". Then I met her again during the band jamming session. Being an awkward person, I didn't say much to her, except smile. Heck! I hardly speak to Luqman for more than 3 minutes! Then he married her.... I was shocked... there goes another cute guy... haih... lepas ni dah takleh ushar Luqman lagi... dia dah jadi suami orang...

I'm still digesting the news. Don't shock me more with news that Sari got pregnant okay!

Again, congratulations dude... sungguh sangat berani anda berkahwin pada usia sebegini muda (he's only 22... well, going to be 23 this year). Not to mention you are still studying..

semoga berbahagia hingga ke anak cucu, and hopefully you have a GREAT life together with her!!

ps: to all my friends that currently having boyfriends/girlfriends, I wanna ask, when are you guys getting married???

Apr 18, 2009

spent my money.....

yeah, i just received my scholarship money yesterday.
and yeah, being me, i spent some of it on shoes and bags...

these are what i bought..

oh yeah, my partayyyy shoes...
They're 4-inches high.. and silver in color.
I successfully managed to wear it, just to figure out, that they are PAINFUL AS HELL!!! takleh pakai buat jalan-jalan.... isk... (shoes from chrysalis)

next, the biker bag! it's humongous, and it's squishy... notice the chain and the zips.. plus the black faux leather... my dream came true!!!! ahahahahhahaha! (bag from Hana)

this one, is a vivienne westwood argyle style look-alike. since i still can't afford the rm2000 vivienne westwood bag, so i settled for rp149 000 steal purse. haih.... (purse from spyderbilt)

hohoho! rocker style to the max!! anyway, congrats to Luqman and Sari for the wedding!! hehe... seriously tak sangka Luqman would be the first from our batch to get married... I always thought that he's a player by nature... (by the way, he's a cradle snatcher... his wife still haven't even finished high school yet... XD)

Apr 15, 2009

The Pogung Ballad: Part 2

I moved out to a new house last February, with two housemates, Yasmin and Wannab. Our new house is situated in Pogung Dalangan, only 15 minutes walk to campus, but 10 minutes walk to main road... thank god for the bike!

Out of the three, I'm the oldest, followed by Wannab and Min.

And, in the matter of maturity (more like acting your age), Wannab wins. She's patient, responsible and focused on the task. Unlike me, who is easily distracted by anything, and not to mention easily bored... hahahaha!!!

The new house is nice, despite my room not having door handle on the inside (I managed to make it CRUMBLED, not broke it, mind you, crumbled it to pieces), Min's room leaked terribly (it's fixed, but still have occasional drops...), inaccessibility of internet (due to our "friendly" neighbor who refused to let the internet cable passed above his roof), and the permanently out bulb in the bathroom. I painted my room yellow and bright green, while Wannab and Min decided to paint the house (and their rooms ) purple and pink. Very girlish, and funky (my room is funky).

Since the rooms were bare when we arrived, we took the liberty to decorate it as we wish. A lot of thoughts, planning and sweating involved. Not to mention the money spent. I managed to get broke one month after I got my scholarship money. Argh. As usual, my room is full of anime posters, books and junks. No beds, just a thick springed mattress, two wardrobes, a study table, two racks (one is full of books, and the other is full of junks), a laundry basket, and the focus of the room, an acoustic GUITAR, which I hardly touched.

Our living room is bare minimum, we have couches, left by previous tenant I presume, which are old, dusty and torn here and there. A cute new fridge (cost us around Rp 1.3 million...) that is always full of weird stuff, my old tv, and a ps2 plus a DDR dance pad (the girls love it! They come to visit us, and danced to HSM songs...)

Then there's the garage cum ampaian (where we parked two scooters and a bike and hang our clothes, duh!), washing area, kitchen, and a small garden which is tended by someone (we suspected the house owner paid him because somehow she knew that we won't take good care of her garden). Yep, it's a nice house, just nicely fit us three (and we only have 3 bedrooms), even though it's a bit hidden and surrounded by bigger houses left, right, front and back...

Meanwhile, I got myself a new hangout buddy, Zul. After hanging out with him for around 2 months or more (or less), he got himself a girlfriend. Fantastic. And his girlfriend is currently staying in Malaysia. Just great. Now everytime I hang out with him, I'll feel guilty for going out with someone's boyfriend. Argh! I have to find a new hang out buddy, fast. Preferably someone who can ride a bike, have great sense of direction, not afraid of going out late at night, and has no problems in mindless riding. Anyone??

I still stalked Jern like a paparazzi stalked a celeb. But not as intense as before. Bored maybe?

Haih, I still have strong dislike over Pathology Anatomy. Help!

Apr 12, 2009

The Pogung Ballad

The unmade bed and very messy room
Nice housemates and late night outings
A best friend with a girlfriend
Camera full of another

Dusty roads and scorching sun
People stare out of curiosity
Same words different meanings
I wanna go home

Some breaking up and another hooking up
And there’s a secret marriage going on
Too much latency it’s frustrating
Feels like screaming out

Cold and windy bright nights
Not a shop opens after 9
Sweating after practices
I’m not into futsal

4 hours-ride on bike to another city
Hanging out in boy’s room till late
A delicacy of home-cooked meals
Never have enough money

Dusty roads and scorching sun
People stare out of curiosity
Same words different meanings
I wanna go home

*So much had happened between the last proper post and now... so i just condensed it in one short poem. boleh ka? XD. I'll prolly explain about it in the next post.. (I hope)

Mar 18, 2009


I'm currently trying to stalk a guy... whom i met for 5 minutes in two occasion..

i only managed to get his name right before he went off to malaysia and god knows where.

pathetic huh?

Mar 4, 2009


i feel like kicking my new BFF now.
ohh... dah ada awek skang tanak kawan ngan aku plakkk....
macam ni la kawan...


congratz dude for the girl. she's damn cute wei!

Feb 17, 2009

Maaf, Sorry, n Gomen

I know it's been ages since I last updated my blog. SORRY. I have no internet connection at home (yes, home. Finally I rented a house with two other classmates), too broke to go to the cyber cafe, plus the computer lab in campus is always full with swarming juniors (HAHAHA!).

A lot had happened to me in the past two months, moving out, stepping up, getting new hangout friend, impulsive rides, batch projects......

Oh, this isn't my blog entry..
I still haven't had internet connection at home, so i'm just writing this to fend off raje of me.. HAHAHA!

I hope I can be online real soon...hiks..